How I Survived March Madness

Annie's Log, 4/6/16

As many of you may have heard, the North Carolina Tar Heels lost in the NCAA men's basketball championship game against Villanova to a heartbreaking buzzer-beater shot by Kris Jenkins.

This shot was taken after Marcus Paige scored an equally (if not more) impressive three point shot from well behind the arc to tie the game with 4.7 seconds left.

Hopes were high after this classic Paige moment, and were dashed just seconds later.

But I don't want to talk about that.

Not because I'm bitter or anything. It was an incredible game, hard fought by both teams. I could complain about shotty officiating or wallow in "if only we'd made this shot/free throw/block." I'm not going to do that today.

No, I'd like to talk about another game from the tournament this season. A game that was actually probably more important to me, all things considered. A game that created one of the most stressful evenings of my entire life.

I am talking, of course, about the UNC-Syracuse Final Four game.

Let me regale you with the story of how I, a lone Tar heel living in Syracuse, New York, managed to survive a viewing of the UNC-Cuse Final Four Tournament game while completely surrounded by Orange.

First, let me set the scene:

A group of international students want to have the "real college experience" of watching their team play a big game at a bar manage. Now, at the last Syracuse tournament game, we walked to Fagan's, a slightly more "upscale" bar by Syracuse's campus (if a college bar can be classified as "upscale"). While walking, we passed this place called "Hungry Chuck's." Thirty minutes before the SU game was supposed to start, the line to Chuck's was at least 200 strong out the door. It was not a pretty sight.

Guess where everyone wanted to go to watch the Final Four game?

(Yes, that is the real logo)

We arrived almost 2.5 hours before the game was supposed to start and still ended up having to wait in line for about an hour and forty-five minutes.

Now, as I said in my previous log post, I was rooting for UNC.

In wanting to support my team, I chose to wear a subtle Carolina shirt: my navy Class of 2015 long-sleeved shirt, which has a small logo on the front and a large logo on the back, both of which can be easily hidden under a jacket.

I was feeling pretty proud of myself, wearing a subtle navy shirt which could be supporting either Syracuse (whose color is, as we know, Orange, but is often complemented with navy blue) or Carolina (which is also often complemented with navy).

When I saw what I will refer to from here on out as the "Horde of Orange" or "Hordange" (or probably just "Horde"), I began to regret my decision.

We waited in line at Chucks for over an hour and a half, and all the while I was surrounded by the enemy. I was disguised, and only those who knew me knew of the awful secret hiding just beneath my lapel. Needless to say, I was on edge.

It was cold, crowded, and loud. Entering the bar was ridiculously inefficient and excessively pricey. All the while, I had terrible images of what might happen if someone saw my shirt for what it truly was: a Carolina shirt.

Would a riot start? Where were the fire exits, in case I need to escape? Would I be thrown out?

My group found a spot in one corner where we could see the screens relatively well and the Horde settled in to watch the end of the painful Villanova-Oklahoma game (which Nova won by 44 points).

This is a picture I found online of Chuck's from the inside on a normal night:

This was my actual view:

I cannot even begin to describe to you what I felt when the first Final Four game ended and mine began. It was like trying to smuggle honey-covered salmon through a room full of grizzly bears, except I was wearing the honey-covered salmon and I couldn't leave until the bears were done getting all worked up over the fight between the Grizzly Bears and the Lions and I think I'm getting off track here.

I felt like a spy, kind of, except that when spies are sent in, it's typically to gather information of some kind so that someone can benefit from it so they can then leave. No one was going to benefit from me sticking this game through except my pride, and that took a few blows.

Let me tell you, it is exceptionally strange to be the only person out of about 150 people who is on one side of something. Every time something good (to me) happened, everyone "booed" and every time something bad (to me) happened, everyone cheered. Meanwhile, I had to keep everything inside for fear of attracting too much attention to myself.

And let me tell you, when everyone started to "boo" Roy Williams, I was sorely tempted to do something ill-advised.

Anyway, once the game started, everyone's eyes were glued to the screens, including mine. I had to bite my tongue at every three point shot that someone nailed, or every dunk or rebound or turnover or steal or ridiculous foul or made free throw, regardless of who was doing it. I couldn't scoff when the Orange did something or cheer when the Heels did something in return.

I feel like I've mastered the art of the mime now that I've survived watching a huge sporting event without being allowed to make any noise.

Fortunately, the Tar Heels came out on top.

And I had the chance to celebrate, just a little, on the walk home.

                    (The caption says "Me with all the other Tar Heels in Cuse")
That's pretty much all there is to it. I survived, and then went on to have my heart broken about 48 hours later.

To finish this out, here are some of my tweets from that night:

End Log.

A Tar Heel in Cuse

Annie's Log, 3/29/16

Firstly, I would like to apologize for not posting a blog for, like, a month. That comes down to a combination of no time and no inspiration. I will do my best to keep to my (admittedly rough) weekly schedule from now on. My writer's block has finally been broken, however, because something amazing is going to  happen. Something terribly, wonderfully interesting. I only dread it a little bit.

The Carolina Tar Heels are going to be playing the Syracuse Orange in the Final Four.

What.

That's right, my undergrad and my current grad school are playing each other for a spot in the championship game of this year's NCAA Men's Basketball tournament.

Last week, I watched Syracuse (a 10-seed team) scrape out a win against Virginia (a 1-seed team), while following the UNC game on my phone (UNC beat Indiana by 15 points in a definitive victory). I was wearing Carolina colors that night, but no one cared because the games were at the same time and every TV was on the SU game.

This Saturday is going to be different.

I never thought that this would happen because, frankly, no one really expected Syracuse to make it to the tournament based on their early regular-season play. Between missing their coach for 9 games due to suspension and general losing, it didn't seem likely that they would be able to count this season for much. And yet, here they are.

Wow.

While I am currently a student at Syracuse, surrounded by Syracuse fans, I am a Tar Heel. I will be cheering for UNC (which is going to make for an interesting night).

But, honestly, how could I NOT root for Carolina?

I spent for years on that campus. I drank from the Old Well. I sang the alma mater countless times. I survived 8 full semesters (and 1 summer session) at one of the most rigorous public schools in the country. I had innumerable lunches in Lenoir and Ram's Head dining halls. I sat out on the quad on sunny days and watched the world go by. I wrote papers in the Undergraduate Library, looked out over the campus from the 7th floor of Davis (that was my favorite floor because it's where the Shakespeare books are), and sat in the Student Union during my breaks.

I ate at Alpine Bagel, Buns, Top of the Hill, Suttons, Bandido's, Jamba Juice and Freshens, Carabou Coffee and Cosmic Cantina, and, especially, Bski's.

I've laughed, cried, and cheered over more life events at UNC than I can count.

I watched the Duke game where Austin Rivers won with a buzzer-beating 3 pointer. I watched the State game where Marcus Paige won it all with a last-second layup during his sophomore year. I mourned with my school after Dean Smith's death, and kept up with every game I couldn't actually watch on Twitter.

After all of that, how could I not root for UNC?

No matter what, it's going to be an interesting game. Tears will be shed. Blood will be spilled (metaphorically, I hope). The call and response of "TAR" and "HEELS" will ring out, opposite "LET'S GO ORANGE." Orange and Carolina Blue will clash in the stands.

Roy Williams and Jim Boeheim will meet in Texas with their teams to play a game that means a LOT to me.

It's going to be an interesting night.

End Log.

(P.S. GO HEELS)

A Guide to Being Emotionally Invested in a Television Show

Annie's Log, 2/25/16:

Last night, I finished watching Season 5 of Game of Thrones. It left me emotionally wrecked. Honestly, the texts I sent my best friend were almost exclusively in all-caps. They were angry and hurt and full of a pain that only fictional situations can inflict.

I can honestly say that I don't think any televisions how has made me feel so much. Ever. And I watch shows written by Shonda Rhimes.

If you don't watch Game of Thrones, I implore you to give it a shot. Watch the first two episodes. If right now, you're thinking "Meh, it's just not my kind of show," you could be right. But if you like TV shows about politics, or justice, or war, family, love and hate, espionage and mystery, adventure, knights and kings, betrayal, society and class, coming of age, or gender roles, give Game of Thrones a real try. Not a "I'll make myself sit through the first episode and play with my phone most of the time so I can say I tried watching it," but actually try watching it.

Further, if you're at all interested in shows that have an exceptionally high production value, a brilliant ensemble cast, genuinely solid writing, gorgeous costumes and sets, a unique setting, and plenty of twists and turns, Game of Thrones is the show for you.

Yes, there's violence (some of it very graphic), yes there's sex (the show's on HBO, so it's pretty explicit), yes there's language (again, HBO), but it all adds to the show in a very well-crafted way. Very little feels gratuitous or thrown in just for shock value. I mean, sure, a lot of it is shocking, but it's not there just to shock you.

I could go on and on and on and on about how great this show is, and how much I can't wait for the next season, and yadda yadda yadda. But I can't, in good conscience, recommend this show to anyone without the following caveat:

This show will hurt. Characters die, often in gruesome, unfair ways. Characters that you love will go away and characters that you absolutely loathe will walk away unscathed. There will be times when you'll wonder why you're doing this to yourself, why you're letting yourself get so attached to a show that's just going to hurt you again and again.

The same could be said for a lot of television shows (*cough cough* Shonda Rhimes *cough cough*). BUT, if you're prepared going into things, you can lessen the heartache. Which is why I've written

A GUIDE TO BEING EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN A TELEVISION SHOW

So, there's a show you're watching that has well written, believable, lovable and hateable characters. Congratulations! This show will most likely break your heart. Several times.

That's just the way the world works. Sorry. Fortunately, this guide will help lessen the inevitable blow that comes with such an emotional investment. So settle in, pour yourself a drink, and find something to cuddle, because you never know when your favorite show is going to emotionally gut you like a fish!

Step 1: Be prepared

I already mentioned settling in, getting a drink, and finding something to cuddle, but even that may not be enough.

Take some time before you start watching to center yourself. Think about all of the good things that have happened in this show, and try to convince yourself that they won't come to a horrible, heart-wrenching end. If you're about to watch a well-advertised "event" episode, a "very special episode," or a season final, you might as well dedicate your whole day to this. Just to be on the safe side.

Keep tissues, small fluffy animals, and comfort food and drink nearby, even if things seem to be going really well. If things don't seem to be going really well, warn anyone in the immediate area that things are about to get ugly.

Step 2: Do your best to keep things from impacting your everyday life

It's hard to separate the life you live with your TV or computer from real life, but you have to keep in mind that not everyone lost their favorite character the night before. Not everyone is feeling the emotions that you are feeling.

(But let's be real, they totally would if they'd been watching that episode too).

This is often the most difficult part of being emotionally invested in a TV show, but fortunately there is a solution:

Step 3: Find someone who understands

Finding other people who watch the show, and care about it in the same way that you do, is a godsend. Being able to discuss the intricacies of a character's story arc, the ways in which the show's plotline deviated from the books, the way things should have happened if the writer's knew what they were doing, is an incredible feeling. It's even better if you can watch the show with someone else and discuss these things while watching.

Warning: you can very well lose hours of your life discussing TV with someone equally as invested as you.

Step 4: Be prepared for its inevitable end.

Firefly never got a second season :(

All good things must come to an end. That includes fictional universes that seem to matter more than the real one. Yes, it's hard to lose your FRIENDS,

your Community,

it's tough when someone takes away your Glee,

but, honestly, that's just the way the world works. Shows come and go. If things don't naturally run their course and are artificially prolonged, they lose what makes them great (*cough cough Scrubs, Supernatural, Dexter, Grey's Anatomy cough cough*).

Personally, I think that it's better for a show to run its course and end on it's own, good terms than turn into something you don't even enjoy anymore. I'd rather the writers get to say goodbye in their own way than have to keep things going and going until the show is hardly recognizable. It's hard, sure, but when a show you love is ending, just be glad that you had the chance to watch it in the first place.

Note: This totally doesn't apply when a show is cut down in its prime or before it even got the chance to live, with no warning and no opportunity to say goodbye. Then you're totally good to never let go and never get over it. I'll never forget you Firefly, Alphas, Arrested Development (original series)!

Step 5: Remember, it's just a TV show. Right?

...Right?

(We all know it's more than that)

End Log.

Punny Penny

Annie's Log, 2/5/16,

A story:

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Punny Penny.

Punny Penny spent most of her days trying to be productive, but she struggled to find the perfect profession.

Punny Penny learned sign language because she figured it would be a handy skill.

Unfortunately, she didn't exactly pick it up hand over fist.


She started to study meteorology as well,

but every time she tried to predict when there would be clouds, she mist.

She wanted to be a chef,

but she didn't take care in seasoning and was nearly arrested for reckless assault.

She even tried being a professional angler, because she wanted to be a reel woman.

It didn't go well-she was total carp, even when she tried to look at it from every angle.

When she started working at a factory for handles, she got super cranky.

She thought that working as a calligraphy tutor would help her develop character,

but it was harder than she thought-definitely not just black and white.

When she tried to work as a concrete pourer,

she complained that the job just got harder and harder.

Punny Penny tried to work as a duct tape-disposal specialist,

but she got too attached to it all, and when she tried working with baby goats,

but she forgot her kid gloves.

Fortunately Punny Penny finally found a job: she's presently employed as a gift wrapper.

End log.

A Guide to Dressing for the Cold

Annie's Log, 1/18/16

In the harsh winter months, when the winds chill to the bone and make it incredibly difficult to leave the comfort of one's bed, motivation is hard to come by.

Fear not, however, for there is still hope of staying warm when forced to exit the heated walls of civilization. This Guide to Dressing for the Cold is available for anyone who fears the chilly air, whether that air is located in Siberia, or simply between you and your car, or even you and the shower.

Anyone will tell you that the key to remaining warm in the cold is layering. The following will detail the steps you should take to layer yourself so that you can defend against the cold.

Step 1: Layer yourself with emotional support.

The first layer of your emotional support should be determination.

If you are not completely determined to make it through the cold, you should probably just crawl back under a blanket where it's warm and quiet and not windy.

Next, layer yourself with anger.

Be angry at the cold! How dare the cold give you goosebumps or make you shiver?! Stupid temperatures! The heat of your own anger and hate-fire will keep you warm on the inside. (*Safety warning: if it would be helpful to break a thermometer or two to build up your anger, don't use one that has mercury in it*)

Finally, layer yourself against expectation. Protect yourself from it. 

Even if you know that the air outside is sub-zero (or slightly less warm than the air around you at the moment), don't think about it. Assume nothing. That way you won't be disappointed or shocked or angry when you encounter the cold. If you do this correctly, the most you'll feel is mild surprise and intense resentment.

Step Two: Begin physical layering.

Layer yourself with the pelts of conquered animals, or materials you harvested from the earth. Things that thrive in the cold (yaks, bears, wild scarf-bushes, mitten trees, etc.) are your best bet.

If these are unavailable, I guess regular clothing will do.

Start with socks. Socks are great. The thicker the better. They don't have to match one another. Heck, you can wear two socks, or three. You can even wear socks on your hands if you don't have gloves or mittens. Pour some soup into a thermos, and then pour the soup directly into a sock for an on-the-go snack. You can use the other sock to carry around crackers. Tape a sock to your nose and you'll look like an elephant. Socks can be used to make sock puppets if you find yourself stranded somewhere due to inclement weather and moral is low. Socks are great!

Long sleeves and long pants are next, which makes sense. Then grab a jacket. Cool, next step.

Step 3: Layer yourself with extra clothing.

FASHION?

Grab another shirt or jacket, maybe a sweater, another pair of socks.

Step 4: Layer yourself with even more clothing.

Grab another jacket or a shawl or something, and layer yourself with more determination, anger, and anti-expectation while you're at it.

Step 5: Keep going. You're not layered enough yet.

Grab a scarf or a throw rug or something. I don't know. What do you have around the house? Just go for it and use it to layer against the cold. You wanted to look good while staying warm? Yeah, that's a different guide.

Step 6: Don't stop now. You'll probably still be cold. Trust me.

Grab a hat and a scarf and apply them accordingly.

If you followed all of the steps correctly, you should look like Ralphie's little brother from A Christmas Story:

"I can't move my arms!"

You are now ready to go out. You'll probably still be cold. Good luck.

End log.